Tuesday, April 2, 2013

No Free Pass

You know how people like to have their celebrity "free pass"? Like if you ever happened to run into a celebrity you've been drooling over and he/she actually wants to have sex with you, your significant other would be totally fine with that? Turns out I don't get one of those. I found out last night that Jason did not care for my Liebster post where I talked about hottie Adam Levine.

In his words, "the guy is in great shape, doesn't look anything like me and you want to have sex with him". He said that it made him feel like shit. I understand that this is coming from a place of real insecurity for him. He is not happy with his body or how he looks and reading about my celebrity crush only exacerbated those feelings.

I actually happen to find Jason incredibly sexy and have told him so many times. I don't think he believes me yet. He knows that he needs to workout, but has not quite had that "a-ha moment" yet. He has to find that motivation within to work on himself. I can't push him to do something that he's not ready to do yet.

For the record, if I ever did meet Adam Levine and he did want to have sex with me, I wouldn't do it. It would be too intimidating and too much pressure. Plus, who wants to have sex with someone who is way hotter than you? Speaking from a woman's perspective, of course. Anyway, I have a great thing going and I don't want to mess it up.

Switching gears, it turns out that you also cannot have a free pass with food and exercise. We've all heard that "You are what you eat" and "Abs are made in the kitchen", but something really hit home for me tonight.

I have always had a "tendency towards asthma" as I was growing up. Not full blown asthma, just would get winded easily and I would start wheezing. Hence, the reason I was never an athlete. Standing in the outfield and kicking the grass during softball doesn't really count in my book.

As I started a real goal to lose weight and started watching what I was eating, I didn't get as wheezy as often, especially when I cut out sugar. Tonight, it all came rushing back though. I have been snacking my way through the Easter candy because apparently I have no self control. I told this girl that I would do Jillian's 30 Day Shred this month and I am actually going to finish the damn thing. Tonight was day 1 and I was wheezing my way through the entire workout. Obviously sugar is not my friend and although I already knew that, tonight was just an example of how eating healthy can really make a difference in your life. It is nice to have those realizations that smack you in the face every so often.

I posted this picture on IG last night and I cringed while doing it. However, I was looking back at some older pictures and it really struck me at how far I've come. I may still have love handles and a poochy tummy, but I look a hell of a lot better than I did 35 lbs ago.

4/1/13 - 146 lbs  I'm 5'4"

September 2012

About 165 lbs
I have to say that I really hate those pictures and it makes me sad that I let myself be that way for such a long time. However, being thinner and healthier now just makes it that much sweeter. I worked for it as there was no free pass and no magic pill. Just good old busting my ass. Now, who wants to come and hide this Easter candy from me?